TEACHING CHILDREN TO SOLVE PROBLEMS

Conflict is a part of everyone's life. How we deal with conflict determines whether we reach solutions or create bigger problems. When we teach our children the important skill of problem solving, we give them a tool that they can use throughout life.

Young children need adult help in thinking through the problem- solving process. A child who is taught to look at problems and seek solutions will likely be able to resolve problems in positive ways. Adults can guide children through the following steps, 1) stop the action, 2) listen to each other, 3) name the problem, 4) think of possible solutions, 5) choose a win-win plan, 6) carry out the plan, 7) evaluate how well things worked.

In this example, Sara and Timmy are fighting over who plays with a blue car. Stop the action. Ask each child to explain the problem, each listening to the other's view. Each child should suggest some possible solutions. Sara says they could take turns. Timmy says to put the car away and neither can play with the blue car. Sara suggests getting out another car and trading after five minutes. Timmy likes that idea, and it's decided to try this solution. Check back a little while later and see how it is going.

After practicing the process a few times, children become very good at identifying the problem and thinking of different solutions. Soon the process will become automatic.

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Lesia Oesterreich
Family Life Specialist
Iowa State University Extension
1086 Lebaron Hall
Iowa State University
Ames, IA 50011-4380
(515) 294-0363